GALLy It's been a while

It sure has been a while!! been a bit busy getting myself back in working order and my house back in some what of order too. Last month I got my gallbladder taken out and it was something unexpected. I went to the E.R after several days of really bad abdominal pain. (the day after thanksgiving to be exact) Luckily I listened to my sister that google's and WebMD's everything lol and sure enough she was right..it was my gallbladder and had to be taken out. I could hear my sister in my head in the E.R saying "I told you" I think that was more irritating then the pain my gallbladder was causing me.. The in and out surgery turned into a 4 day stay at the hospital,to make the long story short surgery and an ERCP later I was home..at last!!..all I wanted was to just be home with my kids especially my 3 month old that needed to be fed by his mommy. It was such an eery feeling leaving the hospital. When I walked out the door the sun hit my eyes and I didn't even know what day it was. I told my hubby that this was probably what it felt like to be released from jail after serving a long sentence..except I wasn't remorseful or revengeful..ehh! close enough.. so once I got home I was in pain but I was ready to put my MOM face on and get to work. Those few days in jail/hospital really made me think about my health, my kids and my husband. I hated being away from them and not able to be of help. I loved that my husband was there next to me and helping my through it all but I didn't like that I couldn't return the favor. It made me appreciate a lot of things..Today I'm feeling better, physically and mentally. I am ready to take on 2012 and spend this Christmas with my family! This year I have been blessed in many ways and am so grateful for it all. I love this time of year because it gives me the opportunity to reflect on the life of Jesus Christ, on his birth and the greatest sacrifice of all time, the atonement. I am in debt to him for all he has done for me. I know he lives and that one day he will return and I hope to see him face to face and call him Wonderful,Counsellor,Mighty God,Everlasting father....Prince of peace!! I hope everyone remembers the true meaning of Christmas this year..Have a MERRY CHRISTMAS!! be safe and if your feeling sick and google and WebMD say you got something..then you got something!! lol make an appointment and enjoy the rest of the the holidays and Have a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Isiah 9:6

6 For unto us a ^achild is ^bborn, unto us a ^cson is given: and the^dgovernment shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, ^eCounsellor, The ^fmighty ^gGod, The ^heverlastingFather, The Prince of ⁱPeace.

AND IT HITS ME!!!

It's obvious I know. Was I in denial? of course! Do I want to accept it? not at all!!... it hit me hard tonight how much my little girl has grown. The truth is that it makes me cry thinking of it. I love her even when she is super! super! naughty ( Sadie's favorite word "super") or super super whinny! I was looking at old pictures of her and I just have been thinking about her so much this week. Like the funny things she use to do when she was little and all the mischievous things she has done. There are a few things about her that drive me nuts..like the fact that she hasn't grown out of the whole putting things in her mouth!! everything goes in her mouth. Makes me nervous as heck. Sadie also loves to break all of her toys! Makes it really hard for me to want to buy her "new" toys. I have a love hate relationship with her energy level especially when mine is low!! but I am grateful that she is healthy enough to be as crazy as she is..I love watching her wiggly wiggly wiggly (that's what she sings when she dances) and I love when she stands on my tall dustpan and uses the long handle as a microphone and sings her heart out..I love when she starts talking jibberish and says "I speaking Spanish mom "(yeah I am that Mexican mom that hasn't tried hard enough to speak Spanish to her kid, my bad..she can take Spanish in school!!).. I am always amazed at how forgiving she is when I loose my patience with her. i love her for that! She recently keeps saying how excited she is to go to school and it makes me sad. I feel like she is breaking up with me lol! It really is difficult to think that in several months she wont rely on me 100% She will rely on her teacher,lunch lady,her playground monitor and her bus driver to teach her,feed her, protect her and get her home safely! all the things I do for her on a daily! I shouldn't be so dramatic but its a BIG deal people! I do have to accept it and allow her to be that big girl she is becoming but as a mother its sooo hard.. today it has hit more then ever and I hope I'm not the only one that has felt this way. If so I need to see a shrink!

Here is a picture of my baby girl when she was about 18months this is a great picture because it shows the real sadie, so cute and sweet but with mischief in her eyes!! lol sure enough 20 min. after this picture she went head first into a bucket full of ice and soda, because she wanted soda!! she was soaked and not scared at all!! I think I freaked out more then her.

Before the bobbing for soda incident

After!

This is the sweet little angel in her cousins clothes. After she got soaked!

PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE!!

This week has been a TEST...I will say! that I am a horrible test taker..I usually get anxious and moody and well the outcome is, major FAIL! but at least I tried, trying is good....The TESTER: GOD himself. Now these tests are what gets your foot in the door.(pearly gate doors). In these cases failing is not an option!!! :) I am unsure if any of you have stopped and realized the responsibility we have with our children.(I'm sure you have and if you haven't u need an intervention!) The impact we have on them,on their future,their self esteem and how it all comes down to US the parents.. Well I stopped and thought about it, bad idea! It scared the hibbi jibbis out of me and made me buckle up and reminded me I needed to be more PATIENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that's what it all comes down to and thats where the test begins!!...MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY!!! (patience) BUT I WANT IT, BUT I WANT IT (patience) NO! (patience) ITS NOT FAIR!!! (patience!!!!!) You soon become a patient(get it! jijij) in your own loony ville mind!!!! but at the end of the day instead of beating your child and feeling guilty.. your PATIENCE pays off!! those moment you were patient you were actually able to teach your child a lesson. You showed them how to deal with their anger and attitude instead of showing them the wooden spoon or in my case the huarache!! ande le!!!! (lol that means sandal) I am grateful for this wild week!! as crazy as that sounds but it truly allowed me to learn, to teach and to rely on the lord for patience in a stressful time..I am making my child sound like a demon child but she is not! she is just 3 going on 16 lol I love her to death and she acts up and that's my moment to shine! I can either scream and be nasty (like the lady from the dollar store "I'm gonna tear you up when we get home" geeesssh!!BTW i had never heard that one before!!!) or I can stay calm and give her options or take away options!!! Its taken me a while to learn this and I am blessed to have a very forgiving and loving daughter..I am also very blessed to have a loving Father in heaven that has given me the opportunity to have these beautiful spirits in my home and for testing me and helping me through it and also comforting me when it gets rough. I love that he reminds me that its not always easy...but it is WORTH it!

WEIGHT LOSS

I hate talking about this!! mostly I hate facing the truth..I need to loss weight big time!! I have done great after having baby #2 I lost all the weight I gained plus some. I am now back to pre-baby weight which was OVER weight..My biggest problem is PRIORITIES! this might sound awful but I put my family first before anything and well at times I shouldn't!! (let me explain because your probably asking yourself whats wrong with that) Days where I am sitting on the couch watching baby animals save the world. I should be going for a walk or working out some how. Its hard to walk away from my family and do something for myself...since the hubby is working full time/school full time and also has church responsibilities it gets hard for me to say "hey watch the kids while I go work out"..Mostly because the moments we CAN spend together I rather do that then go for a jog!! The hubby is always willing to watch them but I choose to hang out with them and that needs to change. I would do anything for my family and I need to get my priorities straight. I need to work on my health so I can be with them longer,so my family can continue to grow and so I can keep up with them. This is one of those things where I do have to put myself first so I can be a better mom and spouse. My priorities need to be re-arranged :) not necessarily change because my family is very important! I will slowly work on this and put the bon bons away!!!

One of those days!

Today was one of those days I could eat a whole box of Twinkies by myself and not feel 1 ounce of guilt! My 3 yr old was acting very 3!!! my newborn was acting very newborn!!!! lol I was overwhelmed with that chaos. While my mind was stressing about other things! what color to paint the vanity,what comforter to buy my daughter...KID OVERLOAD..PROJECT OVERLOAD!! We bought a house that needs a lot of TLC. At times I regret it but once the project is done I am glad I live here..These are some of our before pictures of my current project The Master Bathroom! I didn't take great pictures because I was rushing that day but basically this is it. Baby blue bathroom with old fixtures,old wallpaper border, old carpet..yes i said carpet there was baby blue carpet in the bathroom it grossed me out just thinking what all was on that carpet. Lets just say we got rid of that carpet before we even moved in..

The toilet is hidden behind this wall!

Ugly blue! Old vanity with gold everything!!! There is a small closet on the left and next to the shower for storage..SO now do you understand my stress!! all these ideas roaming in my mind. Wishing I had the money for new this new that! all while listening to my 6 week old scream/cry my 3 yr old climb on the counter to get a cookie and whine/cry the whole way up! all I could think of is WHERE's THE CREAM FILLING!!! I sound pretty negative(sorry) but I snapped out of it soon! I prayed for strength and it came. This is all part of being a stay at home mom I guess. Hopefully tomorrow it will be less crazy! I'm excited to continue with my project but if it drives me this crazy I'll have to place it on the back burner while I learn how to juggle life with 2! I'll also need to control my emotional eating habits!! good thing Twinkies no longer live in my home!!! ;) When I finish my project I'll be sure to post picture!

Let's get real!

The first item of business!!! BREASTFEEDING... I feel like writing about this because, well I have been on both sides of the fence. I have 2 children 1 was formula fed right out of the womb (well 1 week after) baby#2 which is currently 6 weeks old is getting breastfed.. With my first child i was told breastfeeding was an amazing bonding moment a time where you and your child can relax and enjoy each others company.............(did your sibling ever give you a titi twister when she saw you were finally growing boobs??? I ask you this question..was that BONDING!!!!..NO!!) Breastfeeding hurts like heck I'm gonna be honest!! I was thinking that it was gonna be a walk in the park but during my walk I got jumped by nipple biting Purana's!! I truly felt like a failure. I wanted to feed her but she would make me cry from the pain and also bleed. I thought this was not normal! so I quit! I popped a warm bottle in her mouth and felt the bonding begin.. but with baby #2 I thought I need to try harder maybe he will learn to latch on right. Sure enough the pain began at day 2 I looked at my hubby and said "would you be disappointed in me if i quit"...I felt so much pressure to continue breastfeeding not just from my husband but from friends,family and others..They weren't telling me do it, do it!! it was a silent pressure the one that kills!!!(or the pressure that is only in YOUR head) I was so glad my nurse that discharged me from the hospital was honest she said " oh honey it hurts soo bad especially the first week when you are still contracting and with each child it will hurt worse but after the first 2 weeks it will get better and after the month you will get use to it and hopefully enjoy it" ..eekk so 6 weeks later it still hurts but I'm finally finding the joy in it..I'm sure there are a lot of you out there feeling like me..you wanna quit but then you don't..that choice is only up to YOU. In my experience I have attempted both my daughter is healthy and smart as can be and she was formula fed. Baby#2 SAME! It is an amazing thing to breastfeed once you get your mind in a right place and focus on what your doing and not the pain of it..As women we need to get real and be honest with new moms and moms to be, not scare the living monkeys out of them but teach them that there is pain involved so they don't end up feeling like me..disappointed in myself because I thought my body wasn't working properly,that I wasn't doing things right. That I was a failure..You bond with your child whether you breastfeed them or not the love you will have for them will be just as strong and I'm sure lots of you can testify to that!! I love my children even if one boob is bigger then the other!!!

Quick tips from a Novus:

*Lanolin!! use this all the time you can buy it at any drugstore or walmart..Use this especially when showering its a life saver!!!

*Water! drink lots!

*Fenugreek! this helped my milk supply improve

*Pillow a good pillow makes your first experiences more comfortable I had a boppy but it didnt work for me! I just used my own.

Inspiration

My inspiration for this blog is simple..My children. I am a mother of 2! As I laid in bed with my 2 kids, tapping my sons diaper to rock him to sleep while trying to stroke my daughters head. I realized 2 things 1 that I need to work on my coordination (i kept tapping my daughters head) and 2..that I'm doing it!! I really am a Mother. I realized that I am part of the HOOD in motherhood. I feel inadequate at times but I am blessed to have such a forgiving and loving daughter & son. I am learning day by day what it takes to be a "Mother". I want to share my deepest,funniest,depressive and joyful moments with other mothers..Some of us Mothers tend to spend our time looking through the blinds at the mom next door and thinking, how does she do it? she has it all together,she is soo patient!!! she is PERFECT!!..guess what I promise you that mother has the same issues as you!!! my blog will let you realize you are not ALONE!!! ..lets enjoy the blessing of being mothers!! and remember some days will be better then others!!!!!!! We are students and our children are our teachers!!!